You’d Think Maybe the Name ‘Curveball’ Might Have Given Them a Clue
It seems the
In written statements, former
"I did not know prior to I have to give the
I have to give the
However, The WitList has learned that Curveball was not the only source of spurious intelligence used by the
CONFIDENTIAL -- FOR YOUR
Date: 22 April 2005
The following is a summary of a report commissioned by special agent [REDACTED] regarding the reliability of sources used by the Agency for foreign intelligence gathering.
From December 2001 through March 2003, the Agency relied heavily on reports from “Curveball,” a former Iraqi scientist now living in
Germany, as a basis for concluding that had resumed programs to develop weapons of mass destruction. Over that period Curveball provided more than 100 reports, nearly all of which have been determined to be false or otherwise unreliable. Iraq
For example, in February 2002 Curveball provided detailed blueprints for a nuclear centrifuge said to be under construction near Tikrit, as well as aerial photos of a mobile weapons lab outside
. Upon further inquiry, it was discovered that the blueprints were schematics from a Lady Kenmore washer, and the weapons lab was a Volkswagen bus that had gotten lost enroute to a Grateful Dead concert in 1972. Baghdad
As a result of these disclosures, the Agency has been tasked to reevaluate intelligence obtained from [REDACTED], [REDACTED], and [REDACTED] (codenamed, respectively, Screwball, Spitball, and Hairball), and to revise its recommendations accordingly.
Contrary to an Agency report issued in December 2004,
has not acquired nuclear weapons, nor is it regarded as a rogue state. Accordingly, we have urged the Pentagon to scrub the planned carpet bombing of North Dakota . Bismarck
The Agency no longer stands behind its theory that the surge in obesity among Americans has been caused by a race of super-intelligent aliens. The Top Secret report titled, “They’re Going to Eat Us!” has been officially retracted.
Last year, the Agency reported that foreign agents had obtained photographs of senior administration official [REDACTED] (codename “Doughboy”) in a compromising position with a [REDACTED], including the extremely challenging [REDACTED] position, thus exposing him to potential blackmail. At the time, the Agency urged the White House to revoke his security clearance. The Agency has since determined that the photos were forgeries and that [REDACTED] is not that limber.
The Agency now believes the moon is made primarily from pulverized rock, and not a mixture of Swiss, feta, and gruyere cheeses, as was previously reported.
GWB, KR, RC, GT
In the interest of full disclosure, I must report that I cannot entirely vouch for the accuracy of this memo, as my source -- the