What a Wonderful War (a song)

(as sung, by George W. Bush, to the tune of Sam Cooke's "Wonderful World")

Don't know much about diplomacy
Don't know how to spell W-M-Ds
On a map I couldn't find Iraq
All I know is that we must attack

But Dick tells me that I'm the chief
And I'm stupid beyond belief
What a wonderful war this would be

Don't know much about insurgency
Couldn't tell a Shiite from a Sunni
Dick assures me they're in their last throws
But how far they throw I just don't know

Still we're training Iraqi forces
And I know that we do not torture
What a wonderful war this would be

Now I don't claim to be a world leader
but I'm trying to be
Cuz if maybe I was a world leader
You might have respect for me

Don't know much about sacrifice
Don't remember how my shoes get tied
Don't know much about how wars are fought
Can't say I've ever given it much thought

But we'll stay till we have victory
Though what that means is still a mystery
What a wonderful war this would be