Ain't Nuthin But a Ho

Just when you thought things in the Bush Epoch couldn't get more surreal, they do. It seems an administration that turned so-called journalists into whores has turned a whore into a journalist.

Jeff Gannon (real name: James D. Guckert), former "White House correspondent" for the GOP-friendly Talon News site, not only registered Web sites for gay male escorts, he was their main attraction.

Blogger John Aravosis at AmericaBlog.org has uncovered a number of Web sites advertising Gannon/Guckert's services, complete with explicit photos and detailed descriptions of his (ahem) physical talents, the services he's willing to perform, and his rates ($200 an hour, $1200 overnight). Though the naughty bits have been blocked out, it's not for the squeamish. I now know more about Gannon/Guckert than I ever cared to. It will take years for those images to evaporate.

One of G/G's own sites was live for at least a month after he launched his career as Designated White House Press Corp Suckass. Another site where he put his personal profile is still live as I type this. (G/G apparently goes by the nickname "Bulldog" and plays up his image as a former Marine.) Bulldog was a travelin' ho, and liked to serve clients in the DC area.

Suddenly it becomes a lot clearer how a 45-year-old male prostitute with no journalism experience could land a job that takes him inside the West Wing. Here's the scenario I see.

A deeply closeted conservative power broker engages G/G's services as a "trainer/bodyguard/personal escort" for a night of good clean family values. During pillow talk G/G fesses up that he's not as young as he used to be (though he's shaved 10+ years off his real age on the Web sites) and that he's thinking about a career change. The Republican honcho, impressed by G/G's ability to probe deeply and repeatedly into issues of national interest, says 'let me put you in touch with a friend of mine, he needs people for his Web site.' The connection is made, and in a few short weeks Bulldog is inside the press room asking his suckass questions.

Let's say this honcho has particularly close ties to the White House, and he wants to do something nice for his butt buddy. So to let him score points with his bosses at Talon News, he throws Bulldog a bone -- the Valerie Plame story that eventually got leaked by Robert Novak. G/G has at various times claimed and then denied seeing memos describing Plame as a CIA operative, and admits to being questioned about it by the FBI.

Is there any other plausible scenario?

So far, nearly everything G/G has said publicly has turned out to be untrue. Now he's no longer talking to the press. So somebody needs to answer some questions.

Talon News is a volunteer organization. G/G claims he's been living off his savings. Yeah, right. So either he's still turning tricks or he's getting money under the table. I'm betting on the latter. So the question becomes, who's paying him?

We know that Bush press conferences are heavily scripted, and that press secretaries tell W whom to call on. So, did Scott McClellan tell Bush to call on G/G? And did they know what question he was likely to ask beforehand?

Despite G/G's and Scott McClelland's public statements that there's nothing odd about journalists using fake names, no one can recall a single instance where this has happened in the White House Press Corp. McClelland says he only learned of G/G's multiple identities recently, though he also says that Bulldog had to provide his real name and social security number to gain access to daily briefings. So who knew who G/G really was, and when did they know it?

FYI, word inside the Beltway is now that the gay escort angle has surfaced, the Demos don't want to touch this one. (Democrats: The Brave, the Few.) Maybe they have their own gay prostitute problems to cover up. So don't look to Capitol Hill for answers.