The GOP Cannot Be Bought

WASHINGTON - AP: Wanted: Face time with President Bush or top adviser Karl Rove. Suggested donation: $100,000. The middleman: lobbyist Jack Abramoff. Blunt e-mails that connect money and access in Washington show that prominent Republican activist Grover Norquist facilitated some administration contacts for Abramoff's clients while the lobbyist simultaneously solicited those clients for large donations to Norquist's tax-exempt group....

The GOP cannot be bought
The meeting that you long have sought
Can be arranged, though, for a cost
But the GOP cannot be bought

Republicans are not for sale
Their reputations are unfairly dented
Though some members can be rented
Try to buy them and you'll fail

A chat with Dick will cost you dear
But Rumsfeld's price is down this year
And if you've got $10K or so
You can be briefed by Tony Snow

Photo ops with presidents
Is money more than amply spent
Pictures of you shaking hands
Will run at least 100 grand

If you crave time with Rice or Rove
Just send a check to our man Grover
He'll book the meeting in a flash
But please, make it out to "cash"

He'll funnel it to Ralph, then Jack
It will eventually come back
Don't fret; your money won't be squandered
It smells more fresh once it's been laundered

The wheels of government would cease
To spin without sufficient grease
It's a tiny price to pay
For greed, profit, and the Republican way

But the GOP cannot be bought
I want to make this crystal clear
For this is an election year
The GOP cannot be bought